Monday, March 3rd, 2008...1:57 am
Magnetism: Watchers and Doers and what that means.
It’s been a long time since I’ve posted here. Sorry for those of you who have been checking back and haven’t come across anything new. I’ve been phenomenally busy with my web design and search engine optimization stuff, and it just hasn’t left much time for writing on the Enneagram. I’d really like to reach out to any readers here who would be interested in contributing any articles for the website. If you have an idea for an article, just drop me a note on the About Me page, and we can chat.
What I really wanted to talk about with you was something I’ve noticed recently…
It seems that if you can group everyone you know into two different groups- watchers and doers- then you’ll find some interesting trends emerge. It seems like watchers like hanging with doers, and doers with watchers, but sometimes the magnetism isn’t there with people of the same type.
For instance, in many cases I’m a watcher. I like to listen to people, hear what they have to say, and sometimes consider myself to be quite a bore because I just don’t have much to say. I’d rather hear someone else spout off then do the spouting off myself.
However, many Doers enjoy finally getting listened to and appreciated and we get along great because of it.
On the other hand, if I’m hanging with a friend of mine who also happens to be a Watcher, sometimes things are just stale or uninteresting. Or, worse yet, I find myself talking a bunch and then feeling all talked out and self-absorbed afterward. Anyone know what I mean?
And although I’ve never experienced the Doer + Doer relationship, it seems from the outside that it might be too damn competitive for either of the Doers to be enjoying themselves much. They want a watcher there to watch and give them some attention.
What do you think? Does this sound crazy, or somewhat true? Leave some comments below!
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4 Comments
May 22nd, 2008 at 11:21 am
I’m a “doer”. I am worn out by “watchers” because they don’t “do”.
The “watchers” in my life know I will “do”, so they fall deeper into their “watcher-ness”. There is no motivating them. So I continue to “do” and they…well, watch.
Liv
May 22nd, 2008 at 5:21 pm
Thanks for the opinion Liv. Sounds like you get stuck pulling the weight for watchers sometimes…
May 28th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
[...] Enneagram 2 Talks about Being a Doer Jump to Comments Recently a reader of EnneagramBook sent me her thoughts on the post about Being a Watcher or a Doerand had a response that was certainly worthy of being published. I’d really like to thank her for her response, and it’s published here with her gracious permission. [...]
August 18th, 2008 at 11:41 am
I am a watcher and a doer. Depends on what the situation is. I am counterphobic 6 who sometimes goes into my 5 wing if I am not comfortable with my environment. If I know my stuff, I very much turn on the doer in me.
I have also noticed if I am with a strong doer, I do sometime fall deeper into the watcher mode with that individual. However, I do have conversation with this person to let them know the dynamic so that I feel ok being a doer as well (competition thing) and they don’t mow me over and end up resentful because they are always in the spotlight.
I do understand the conundrum of the “same” hanging out together. I think that is the beauty of opposites. It whether or not each individual is aware of their behavior and learning from the situation presenting itself.
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