Enneagram Book

Our series, “Interview with an Enneagram Life Coach”, works in conjunction with Life Coach Review to provide un-biased reviews on Coaches, as well as sharing Life Coaching Articles and Resources for Coaches and Clients.

Today I am very proud to offer up the last in our 3-part series Interview with an Enneagram Life Coach. (The first two interviews can be found here and here)

This whole series began when I asked the question:

“What exactly does an enneagram life coach do? How can they help us, and what tools and techniques can be learned from studying their approach?”

I believe that some answers can be drawn from all of the interviews. With each person came a different approach and a different perspective. And that is one of the reasons that EnneagramBook is here. It’s the understanding that we all have different perspectives and that we each have something to learn from each other.

Without further ado, I offer up the 3rd in our series Interview with an Enneagram Life Coach:

1. First, please introduce yourself, your professional title, and your enneagram type.

My name is Barbara Bissonnette, I’m the Principal of Forward Motion Coaching, and an Enneagram Type Four.

2. In your practice, do you find that there is a most common enneagram type that comes to you for coaching? Is there a least common type? Do you have any inference as to why this may be so?

I’ve worked with a lot of Nines and Sixes; a fair number of Sevens; only one Five. I forget which Enneagram author wrote that there are a lot of Sixes in American culture. The fact that Sixes want to figure things out may make them more inclined to seek coaching. I think Nines are willing to try something out and see if it works, and looking for direction. Sevens seems to enjoy the novelty of working with a coach and having the spotlight on themselves.

It doesn’t surprise me that I’ve only worked with one Five because coaching involves a lot of self-disclosure.

3. Do you believe that one’s enneagram type is from their nature (set at birth) or from their nurturing (formed during early years)? Is it possible to change types during the course of your life? Can you change wings?

I believe that it’s a combination of nature and nurture, and that we are all born with a hard-wiring for certain personality traits. Then, an individual’s home environment influences what assumptions they make about the nature of the world, and what strategies they find useful for coping.

People who are new to the Enneagram often believe that they have changed type over the course of their life. What’s really happened is that they have grown and matured, so the patterns of their type are less obvious – but they’re still there. People don’t change type.

Concerning wings, what I have observed in myself and others is that the influence of one wing may be greater during certain situations, but I think that there is a consistent “default” preference for one wing over the other most times.

4. Have you ever had to stop working with a client because they “hit their wall” or encounter so much mental or emotion resistance within themselves that they can’t go on? Do people sometimes shut down when you approach the end of their comfort zone?

I provide business coaching services so I have not worked with clients who have severe emotional issues. To be sure, we all tend to become resistant when we move out of our comfort zones, and sometimes a client is not willing to change their outlook or behaviors. Coaching is for healthy people who want to be more effective in their work and personal lives.

5. What are some techniques you use to work with a difficult client? Do you have any methods you use to help people see themselves more clearly or open up when the defenses go up?

A critical component of coaching is building rapport with a client, so in the beginning I really try to understand how they view their particular situation. Obviously, knowing the person’s Enneagram type makes that easier. For instance, if I’m working with a Six and hear about everything that’s going wrong, I know that the individual is not being “difficult” or “negative.” I can use the Enneagram to steer and frame the conversation – for example, making a clarifying statement like, “You’re having a hard time trusting what your boss is telling you.”

Mirroring back someone’s own words and ideas and getting feedback through 360-degree assessments are two ways that people can see their impact on others, and that their perceptions are not necessarily reality.

6. In Enneagram language, how does therapy or coaching further you down your path? IE: Does it help move you on the path of integration, does it loosen your enneagram fixation, etc.

I’ll mention here that I use the Enneagram whether my clients are aware of it or not. The work I do is pragmatic. So I use type as a tool for showing people why they tend to respond to situations in certain habitual ways, and to show them that they always have options. Whether I specifically mention the Enneagram or not, the concept of different “world views” also helps clients understand that other people can see a situation in a completely different way than they do.

7. In closing, can you offer any advice to someone studying the enneagram for personal development and spiritual deepening who practice by themselves?

Study, study, study! The amount of material, subtleties, and nuances can be quite overwhelming when you are starting out. I spent hour upon hour reading and memorizing key points, and even hired Mary Bast of Out-of-the-Box Coaching to give me personal instruction on applying the Enneagram in coaching situations. I remember Mary telling me, after I had already done a popular training program, “You know, it could take a year before it really clicks” and she was right. Even today I find that I deepen my understanding every time I work with someone, particularly when I pay attention to instinctual subtypes.